Today is the fifth Tuesday of the month, which means that my answer to this heartfelt letter is available exclusively to my Patreon patrons.
There is no absolution; there are no clear-cut rules that you can strictly follow and thereby relieve your anxiety. There is only you, doing your best.
When you incorporate your research into your story, do it with a light touch. Keep your protagonist's or narrator's perspective at the front of your mind; don't harp on the things that they will find unremarkable or irrelevant.
Writing marries intuition to intellect, and sometimes the intuition part means you just know when the thing is done and no amount of hacking at it will make it not be done.
When you have a strong, clear idea of what your work is and what it's trying to be, you'll have a much easier time helping it along its path.